66% Missing

66% of my friends have left me. It's sad. I've been extremely close to all of them. I only have 1 left. And he moves the first day of June. I feel like little pieces of me are getting ripped apart and scattered across the country. I now have the ability (and will probably have the ability for a long time) to burst into tears at any moment. It'll be even worse when my last friend leaves, I've know him the longest. At least I know he might come back. I know he will always stay in contact with me. And unfortunately. I'm not sure what to feel or how to feel. I just don't like how I feel right now. I met someone who makes me feel better when I'm with him. But not when I'm away from him. I'm sort of numb. It's going to take a while to get back into things I guess. I don't know what the point of this post is. Sorry.

Stupid Spring

The weather here is going crazy. Hot, cold, hot, cold. It's spring now too and I thought my allergies were acting up (but I never have allergies!!) and now its a full-blown cold. Ughh, I am the worst sick person ever. I suck at being sick. It's the biggest annoyance in the world.

Our lab today included a 90 minute incubation period where we had absolutely nothing to do so the professor let us all go get lunch. I ran into a a few friends, my lab partner and I went down to the cafeteria together. My firing range friend was there, it was so good to see him. Technically he saw me first and my eyes just lit up and I smiled and hugged him. It had been a long time. The three of us (me, the firing range friend, and my lab partner) ate together, and then we went back to lab and finished.

I have work today, not fun when you're sick. I'm gonna use up the second half of that roll of toilet paper I started on Friday. I need to do something that involves keeping my head up though, when I look down my nose starts to run =/

Sunday should be an adventure. I'm going to the place where my high school was named after. I've lived here for 17 years and I have yet to see it.

Not Much to Say

I figured I might as well post. It's been a while. Stressful week but not as bad as the other week. Planning on seeing Shutter Island on Thursday evening, I've heard mixed reviews, I guess I'll find out. It was extremely windy today, it was fun, though I didn't really get to be out in it very much. I honestly do not have a lot to say right now. I'm kind of feeling indifferent about a lot of things. I'll just say goodnight. Goodnight

3 Important People for Life

So after what I account to be one of the worst (if not the worst) weeks of my life. Computer broke and had to get a new one. Too much homework to keep up with. Late shift at work. Little sleep. And my Jacob telling me he has to "let me go" because he thinks I'm seeing my ex again because I had called him (my ex) and he won't listen when I say it's only because I need to get my things back that he had. Oh and not to mention a dentist appointment where they said I need a filling, what a surprise. Honestly I don't know how many teeth I have left to even fill....

Then last night things started to change a little. My dad bought me a new laptop which I have a year and a half to pay him interest free. We went to my favorite restaurant for dinner. This morning I woke up dark and early (the sun wasn't up yet so it couldn't have been bright and early) to play some pickup hockey and I played against my NEW (yet I think he has always been) favorite Marine =]

Most of the time we spent harassing each other, hitting and light checking. We were all having some fun. I didn't like it though when my ex was there on my team and I was on the ice with him and my brother (who is my favorite Marine, Bloggingbrit would understand) and I look over at my ex just in time to see him chest-to-chest pushing and shoving my brother. I stopped on the ice and just watched at my brother, who is bigger than my ex, stand there and just fend off my ex while my ex still tried to sort of tackle him. He said that my brother elbowed him but it clearly did not look like that to me.

After pickup my brother caught me and checked me (he was still in full gear, I was already dressed out) into the outside of the boards and glass and held me there. My entire body (including my face) was smooshed against the glass while he held me there. It's become a routine now every time he sees me he has to playfully check me into the glass and hold me there.

A little while later at the rink, the 16AAA travel hockey teams were there playing and one game was with the Jr. Kings. I was standing around watching all the parents and coaches when one guy stuck out from all the rest. It was Kopitar's dad!! I had forgotten that he coaches the Jr. Kings and I saw him right there, in my rink!! I was in shock and I still am.

I've decided that out of everyone I know, there are only 3 people that I really care about, that I always love getting attention from. They are supportive and want me to do well, and have always been there for me. These are the guys I really believe I can love and not worry about my heart being broken. No matter how often I see them, whether it be weekly, annually, or even never, They are people I really look up to. They are what I really want from a guy eventually. They are really great guys, and for whatever girl they have or will end up with, they have/are getting one of the best guys in the world.

One of these guys is my cousin, he is cool and I can easily say he is my favorite family member. But I rarely get to see him. Once a year if I'm lucky.

The other is who I consider my brother. He is always doing really nice things for his wife, he is so caring and loving. He doesn't gamble, and he doesn't drink. I get to see him every week for the past year and a half until sometime this summer when he is being re-stationed. I'll miss him so much. He is encouraging and playful with me, and no one else could ever be like him, or his family =] He gives me all the physical attention I need each week in a brotherly type of way. Yes I have a crush on him, and I'm pretty sure he knows that, which might partially be why he is a little attached to me as well. He knows I have a little crush and he probably things it's cute.

The third one I'm afraid I'll never get to meet. No matter how mad I can make him sometimes (by accident, I don't mean to upset him), he never threatens to leave me (except once!! grrr) and I fell like I can tell him anything and everything (which is sometimes why I make him mad). He shares this blog with me =]

Final note, it's getting very very dark and cloudy here, the wind is whipping, and the storm is coming. I like it when it rains. My week is turning around finally and the only people that have enough influence over me to make me happy even if its for a little section of time are the people I've mentioned above. I love these guys. And I'm glad to know them. I'm very proud to have them. I don't think I'd be where I am today without them